Friday, December 18, 2009

Sharded Bells

Fulguralis looked with disdain at all the hustle and bustle that surrounded him in the Dalaran Market District.  Vendors were crying out, hawking their wares, while the throng of last minute shoppers scurried about in the streets.  Like demonic gnats drawn inexoribly towards a fel flame, the crowds always came out this time of year as the denziens of Azeroth prepared for a proper Winter's Veil celebration by finding that perfect gift.

Usually, Fulguralis tried his best to ignore the holidays and continue with his business, unbothered by the varies traditions of the season.  He was most certainly not a Merrymaker.  This year, however, things had change.  He was married, and the demonic realm hath no righteous fury like a wifely paladin left out in the cold during the Winter's Veil celebrations.  Luckily for the warlock, his wife had given him a very explicit list of gifts to acquire for the season.  She was at least honest about his shortcomings when it came to merry-making, and had taken appropriate steps to ensure his compliance with her holiday plans.  It was a very immasculating experience for Fulguralis.  Had he no say in his own life anymore?

Still, if one wanted a taste of the Winter's Veil eggnog, so to speak, one must put up with the observation of other traditions as well.

Fulguralis unrolls the scroll and views the list:
  • For Decedereful - An iPwn.  I think it's one of those Gnomish portable music thingies.  She likes to rock out as she's going into battle.  I hear her singing something about being "Back in Black" all the time.  Maybe you can find one of these at the Black Market?
  • For Dusty - If there's one thing a Ghoul needs, it's new clothes.  They always seem to be in rags.  Visit Talismanic Textiles, they'll know his size.
  • For Abigora - The complete "Schools of Arcane Magic" collection.  If you can find one, I'm sure she'll be thrilled.  The only place I know to look might be Curiousities & Moore.
  • For Berry Blue - Go see Christi Stockton, she'll know just the thing.
  • For Midnight - She requested some new undergarments from Legendary Leathers.  Try not to blush too hard.
  • For Sparkie - A mage chew toy.  Breanni probably has these.  If not, a hunter chew toy will do just fine, though they're not as stimulating for the little guy.
  • For DeeGee - He's always on the go.  Something from Like Clockwork would probably be of use to him.
  • For Spaz - Anything from Wonderworks.  He'll break it in a week anyways.
  • For Pablo - I heard he's taken a second job helping to maintain the Archmage's garden.  I guess he burns the weeds away or something.  He's one hardworking infernal.  Anyways, maybe Dorothy Egan at the Herbalists' Greenhouse will know what to get him.
  • For Fulguralis - I'm sure you want a gift card to the Beer Garden again.  Just... please stop harassing the Brewmaidens.
  • For Fuubaar - I refuse to tell you want to get me.  Ask the Light.
Apart from a rather lengthy stopover at the Beer Garden, Fulguralis had done quite well.  He had gotten nearly everything on the list.  Everything except the gift for his sister... and his wife.  What the fel was he going to get her?

He wandered away from the crowd and headed for the ramp that descended to the Underbelly.  His last stop was to be the Black Market to see if he could get the crazy Gnomish device for his sister.  Word on the street was that the devices were pretty popular, so he might have trouble finding one in stock.  He didn't care who's soul he had to drain, Fulguralis was getting the gift his sister wanted.  It was their first Winter's Veil together since the Light knows when.

The Light.  Ask the Light.  What a silly suggestion.  Like the Light was going to answer in some sort of Elven intermittant latern flashing code: SOS.  Three shorts, three longs, three shorts.  Don't ask him why he knew that.

"Hey watch where you're shining that thing!" Fulguralis belows as a rather seedy looking man dressed all in blue holds a candle in the warlock's face.  "You could have singed off my eyebrows!"

"Apologies, my friend," the crafty looking fellow says.  "I sought only to gain your attention."

"For what purpose?" Fulguralis asks warily.

"To show you this," he says, drawing back his cloak to reveal a rather fiesty looking animal.  The thing was about the size of a bear cub, but was dressed quite oddly.  It appeared as if he was wearing a shield on his head.   "It's a Pandaren Monk," the main explains.

Despite it's oddity, it struck the warlock as being kind of cute.  Certainly something that his wife might appreciate.  She was, after all, the queen of cute.  She had droves of cute little critters in her magical manger back home.  "How much?" Fulguralis asks.

"Well, see, there's the tricky part," the main says with a sparkle in his eye.  "What you'll need to do is ask your maker very nicely for ten dollars."

"What are dollars?" Fulguralis asks.

The man smiles and says cryptically, "Just pray for it, and it shall be yours."

"So you're telling me if I just say some prayers, you'll give me that guy?"  The warlock asks, still skeptical.  He wasn't sure if he was being swindled or not.  I mean, the guy was wearing all blue.  Who wears all one color?  What a weirdo.

The man simply nods in response, a cheesy smile dimpling his face.

"Well, I'll need a bit to think about it," Fulguralis says.  Normally a swindler won't let you leave, and in any case he did need to review the situation for any potential pitfalls.

"I shall be here when you receive your answer," the man proclaims.

"Fine, whatever," Fulguralis says, waving a hand and walking away.  He had a decision to make.  Up until now, he had no idea what he was going to buy his wife.  Yet here was the perfect gift and for a prayer!  Ask the Light, right?

Still, thought the warlock, praying is hard.

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