Pebble Approves!

Hey Gang!

So, back to live action! Our vacation was a great chance to unplug from all things interwebs. Which is really odd for Ful & I because we have smart phones, our jobs require us to be on the computer constantly, and we play an addictive MMO. Telling me that I can't do much more than play Plants verse Zombies for an entire week was pretty brutal. I mean, it's hard to pwn newbs when you're in the pool catchin some rays.

Anyways....

So, last night I got a chance to flex my tanking muscles in our weekly guild Heroic run. We were lucky and drew The Lost City of Tol'Vir. Which, by the way, if those stupid cat people can find it, how the hell did we lose it?! Harrison Jones must have been drunk: "Now where did I put that damn City....hic!"

So, we sauntered in, marked up the kitties, threw in the cat nip... wait... I mean the Frost Trap, and ripped it up. This place was rock solid. We downed the bosses with little issue. There was still a challenge but it wasn't eye bleeding pain. We zoned in and zoned out within an hour. It was a blast! Our clothies & hunter got a few upgrades, we all got a decent chunk of Guild XP/Rep, Faction Rep, Justice & Valor Points, and a Chaos Orb for our time spent. All and all, it felt like we had accomplished something. Something that we could have felt in Wrath long before now. Hell, by now, we would have ROFLStomped everything that Blizzard offered us and then we would all quit because we were bored out of our minds, sitting in Stormwind on our Welfare Epics on the biggest mount in the game blocking the Sun.

Cough*

Excuse me....

So, last night was the first night that I actually felt like we had mastered that Heroic. It felt really good and I believe that we've been able to hurdle the gearing issues that a few of our guildies have run into. As of right now, we have (from what I remember) four more Heroic Achievements to get for our guild. That would mean that we've, atleast, seen all of the new mechanics and all of the bosses once.

I've come to the realization: Our Small Guild could not have achieved this feat of strength individually. It was only achieved with the help of everyone collaborating and pooling there resources to assist everyone to get over the "Gear Wall". This was only possible with:

-Multiple Tailors using their cooldowns
-All unneeded Greens & blues disenchanted and donated back into the guild
-Buying Gem cuts for the masses & keeping the guild bank stockpiled
-Alchemists converting Volitle Lifes into needed Airs & Fires & making Flasks
-Blacksmiths making belt buckles that are still extremely expensive
-An ocean of Fishers catching and stuffing buckets of mats for our cooks
-A metric ton of chefs cooking up a storm for everyone's food buffs
-An extensive & organized Guild Bank full of useful mats for every walk of life (Leveling, Professions, Raiding, etc.)
-An entire guild full of people who are ready & willing to run anything with you (Dailies, heroics, regulars, Achievements, etc.)
-Alts that have turned into mules for professions that we're using for Guild Mains (Poor Abigora only sees the Jewelcrafter Daily & the occasional Mt. Hyjal to pwn some elementals)

I could sit here & swoon all day about my guild and how incredibly awesome they all are but I wont because, well, that's annoying. <3

TL;DR The New Changes to Guild Stuff is Awesome!

Pebble Approves!

yeah, I'll bet you were trying to figure out where the title came from.... whelp, there you have it.

Question for you dear reader: Has your guild changed & evolved with the introduction of the Guild Achievements? Has it proven to be a good or a bad thing?

<3 Your Friendly Neighborhood Fuubaar

Using the Mental-Physical Link in Raiding

I attended a coaching seminar last night on the topic of Sports Psychology, which I immediately followed with our usual Monday night raid. Thus, it was easy for me to pick out the similarities between what had just been presented to me and how it applies to raiding.  It struck me once again how similar coaching and raid leading can be, with the same principles applying almost verbatum.

In sports, it's very easy to understand that physical component, though we often neglect the mental component of the game.  Most coaches will admit that their game of choice is largely mental, and yet what part of practice is ever spent in mental training?  Twenty years ago, the concept of mental training was completely foreign to the sports scene, and sports psychology was seen as somewhat of a joke.  After all, you only went to a psychologist if you were a nut-job. 

In more recent years, research has identified the benefits of mental training for elite athletes in any and all sport disciplines.  Sports psychology has seen a rise in popularity, though many of the old school coaches are still hesitant to embrace what they see as smoke, mirrors, and magic.  Still, the results are undeniable, so employing a team psychologist is an idea that's gained a lot of traction in the upper echelons of sports. 

I think it's a lot easier to understand the mental component of raiding, though I think we often fail to link that to the physical component.  After all, what's so hard about pressing keys in response to external, pixel-based stimuli?  You may not break a sweat when raiding (which I actually find I do, by the way), but make no mistake, a couple hours of raiding definitely take a physical, as well as mental, toll.

So, am I suggesting we all hire a guild psychologist?  Perhaps some of the hardcore, professional raiders might benefit from such a move, but 90% of us, no way.   Still, as leaders (or even followers) we shouldn't ignore key facets of team development if we're serious about creating strong raid teams.  Not that they all have to be hardcore, but that there are little things we could be more aware of that have been shown to contribute directly to team success.

Perhaps the simplest and most applicable tip I heard in my seminar last night is one that was equally valid (and abused) in both my coaching life and my gaming life.  Basically, the point was made that, as coaches, we need to focus on positive correction instead of negative corrective action.  That is, phrasing our suggestions for corrective action positively.  It's far to easy to see someone make a mistake and say "don't do that," when instead we should be saying "do do this."  It might seem like we're splitting hairs, or that this is some sort of Dr. Phil, pop-psychology tip, but it's really not.  It really has deep roots in our understanding of the human physiological response to negative phrasing. 

Let me demonstrate. 

Do not look at the clock on your screen.  Don't do it.  Do not look in the lower right hand corner of your screen, at the clock there.  It's probably got some sort of black numbered text font.  It has the AM/PM designation after it.  You know the one.  Don't look at it.  Do NOT.  Whatever you do, do not look at that clock.  That is the incorrect thing to do right now.

What did you do?

If the statistics are true, 20% of you looked anyways.  You know, the old "red button" phenomenon.  For the other 80% of us, we tried very hard to focus on anything but that clock.  And what happened physically?  We tensed up.  Our neck muscles tightened.  If there were EKG probes attached to those muscles, they'd be going crazy as we fought the urge to turn and glance at that clock.  Maybe our hands and fingers even tightened down on something.  At the very least, we saw our physical arousal level increase, and not in a good way.

Athletes often talk about being "in the zone", which has been studied in psychology as "flow" or being "in the flow".  The same could be said of raiding and raiders.  There are times when we are feeling the flow or in the zone.   In this zone, we know exactly what we need to do, and we execute it at a high level.  How do we get into this zone?  Very simply, we balance arousal and focus, combined with a visualization or what we know we need to do.  We are not "flat" (under aroused) or "freaking out" (over aroused).  We are excited, juices are flowing, but we're in that zone.  We are able to block out distractions and focus solely and completely on the relevant cues.  We know what we need to do, and, simply, do it.  It seems so easy, when put like that, yet it's often so hard to get to that state of flow.

A lot of money and effort has gone into studying ways to find the flow.  If you think about it, that makes sense.  It's like taking performance enhancing drugs without the whole drug part.  You're just performance enhancing, and you're doing it all mentally.  What's more, you can develop and hone your mental approach in order to give yourself a better chance of finding the flow.     

Returning to that little example we just did, if we understand that finding the flow is a balancing act involving visualization, then we can easily see how using negative corrective language makes the flow that much more difficult to find.  By saying don't do something, we're contributing to over-arousal while at the same time making it more difficult to visualize the correct task.  We're basically throwing two wrongs out, which we all know doesn't make a right.  If we instead were to use positive correction, as in: do do it this way, now we're avoiding the red button stressor while providing a better visualization of the correct method.

Here's a simple example.

• Instead of: "Don't stand in the fire."
• Say: "Please stand in the areas that are fire free."

Sounds simple and seems to be almost purely an issue of semantics, and yet it's not.  All those "don'ts" add up.  Likely you have at least one person who hears what you said, stays in the bad anyways, and freaks out about it, going straight to over arousal and leading directly into poor play with mental mistakes.  On the other hand, if you've been using that second phrase, they're a lot more likely when they notice that they're in the fire to think: I need to be in an area that is free of fire.  After all, that's what you've just coached them to do.  If you used the first phrase, there is no correct visualization. 

It may not always work, but you are definitely giving yourself a better chance of success by making  a very simple change in communication behavior.  Using negative correction, you don't even give yourself a chance.  With positive correction, it won't prevent all mental errors, but you're being more constructive about it, and that's a step in the right direction.

It's Not You, It's Me

One of our tanks said "peace out" recently.  I wanted to write a snarky email response to the team, but I'm adhering to the "if you don't have something nice to say" rule.  Seems odd for me to do that, being a 'lock and all, but my desire to kill the LK outweighs my desire to create trouble.  At least for today.  No promises on tomorrow.  And no, it was not my wife.  Also, I'm probably beating an undead horse by writing this, but writing is cathartic and I have a blog, so I'm going to try to vent generically.  Here goes...

(Note: I want to make it clear that our tank chose option two, and I respect him for that.  It still sucks, but we have stuff lined up to go on.  I wanted to vent to get it off my chest because I don't think there's a way not to feel hurt, and I've been in a lot of groups where they didn't choose option two.  In fact, I think that's a larger problem in the realm of casual raiding than we sometimes give credit to.  Anyways, I just wanted to make that clear.)

I guess you can't fault a person who admittedly subscribes to the Me First magazine.  It shouldn't then, surprise you when people like that continually place the needs of a team behind their own.  I mean, it is their $15, right, and we should all respect that and junk.  And I guess I just get sort of miffed when people throw out "kids and a family" or "other priorities" or other BS like that as an excuse to leave you in the lurch, and then ask everyone to not "take it personally".  Whereby they mean they want to desert you, and you to be happy for their leaving you.  It's the old "it's not you, it's me" mantra, and I think we all know how that one feels.

(If you don't, I'll let you in: You feel like a PuG.  Like someone just picked you up at a bar and left you in the morning.  Used.  Cast aside.  I maintain that pugging, both IRL and in gaming L, is only tolerable when both parties are aware of the nature of the PuG.  If one party thinks this is a team, and the other a PuG, then someone is going to be hurt.)

I mean, it's hard to argue with these reasons and they sound really good in e-ink.  On one hand, kids and a family are totally more important that a game, I agree.  By all means, if that part of your life is suffering, stop raiding.  Stop playing altogether, I would say.  Or maybe work out the communication issues.  A lot of problems in relationships are simply a result of poor communication, IMO.

I know it can work, the gaming/marriage/kids thing.  I mean, I know plenty of people who are happily married, with kids, and can juggle one (or multiple) two-hour commitment(s) per week (especially if it's not gaming, because, you know... double standards and stuff).  So when I hear the excuse, what I really here is: "playing with you louts isn't worth two hours of my precious time".  And maybe that's true for good reason, but I don't see how I'm not supposed to take that personally.

Or the whole "other priorities" thing.  I'm a busy guy, I get it.  I have tons of important stuff that I do, whether it be coaching, work, writing, or family (Fuu and I both have BIG families, and big families warrant big amounts of your time and travel).  And maybe you just want to go level that brand new Hunter alt you just rolled on the Horde side of things.  The fact remains, we're two bosses out from the LK and you're leaving us short a tank.  In the game I play, tanks are hard to come by.  I can't speak for anyone else. 

In all honesty, what I hear instead of these generic, overused excuses is "I have a problem with the way things are being run or a specific person."  And in that case, I wish you'd just say it so we can all have a fist fight and get it over with.

So Mr. Ful, you might ask, what am I to do if I've legitimately lost my desire to raid (and/or it really is not a personal squabble)?  Well, I believe there is a right way to excuse one's self from a team.  The wrong way is to wait a few days before a raid and simply say "see ya", transferring your toon to an opposing faction or server so that there is no possible way you could be called on as a sub.

The right away?  Make sure the team you're leaving behind will be all right without you.  Talk to the RL about your intentions well in advance.  Let him/her know of your issues.   Be preemptive!  If it's a simple matter of time conflicts, maybe things can be rearranged.  If not, then at least you tried, and that sits with people a lot easier.  Caring is directly proportional to Effort.

Suggest/find a replacement.  Make sure they're geared as near to you as possible.  Especially for a tank, it really sucks to lose someone you, as a team, have spent months gearing up.  The other roles are a little less gear dependent and, thus, easier to stomach, but it still sucks.  If someone is waiting in the wings, then things can transition smoothly and it will go over much better.  Getting shot back two wings in a progression path because you just lost 6 months of skill/gear is a rough pill to swallow, regardless of the reasoning.

Offer to sub as much as possible until a replacement is ready/up to speed.  With the current state of WoW, it shouldn't be that long.  I think people are understanding of a shift in desires/priorities, but everyone else shouldn't have to suffer just because you changed your mind on a commitment.  And, let me be clear, joining a raid team is a commitment.  It may almost be worse the more casual you are, since people are more likely to count on the player and not on the generic class/gear combo.  Plus you generally have fewer folks in the replacement pool. 

If the RL has it all covered, than you're good to go.   Just make sure it's covered first, or leaving can be a lot more dramatic than necessary.  Of course, I guess this is all assuming these are bridges you care about burning.  If you hate all the people, then by all means, choose option one.   I don't care what your reasons are, option one will always cause some sort of hurt.  All it takes is a small amount of effort to let people know you care and have thought about those left behind.  The bottom line is just to follow the Golden Rule, and that little pebble of effort will send out larger ripples of goodwill in the pond of group emotions.

Now, if you're really pissed, then just go all Tsunami on their asses.

I Talk Smack In Raids

Yeah, that's right. I do. Wanna fight about it?  I talk smack to the trash.  I talk smack to the bosses.  And, yes, I talk smack to my fellow raiders sometimes.  Not always is it in vent or chat, sometimes it's just out loud without keying in, but I totally do it.  Tell me you don't do the same.  Honestly?  Liar.

For the record, usually my smack talking is heavily laced with profanity.  Thus, examples will generally be more mild than reality (Ha, me. Mild.  Right).  Actual results may vary.

I wanted to admit to this today because I think there is a general disapproval shown towards talking smack, or e-peening as it's called.  After all, e-peening is childish and bad right?  To a point, I agree, and the majority of what we see is mindless, unhelpful e-peening that crosses that point.  The question I want to ask then is if e-peening can be mindful.  Can talking smack actually help you raid group?  When done correctly, I think so.

I'm going to break my smack talk down into three main types and explain why I believe they can be used constructively in a raid environment.  Now, you have to apply a certain amount of maturity and brain power to the smack talking (But not too much, mind you.  The best smack is generally off-the-cuff).  Also, keep in mind the key is to help the group here, not break it apart.

First, we have the "Screw This Boss" category. 
Let's face it, bosses are meant to be frustrating.  Frustration equals challenge.  Or maybe that's the other way around.  Apply the transitive axiom of equality and you have it.  (Did I just reference an axiom of equality... yes, yes I did.  Wanna fight about it?).  A great way to vent frustration is to talk smack.  Yeah, let it out.  If you wanna call the boss a twatface, do it.  Loudly.  In vent.

The bonus points come here when key that shit in.  Seriously.  Sometimes you're having a wipe-fest and it just needs to be done.  Like on Professor Putrizzle.  I like to yell such inspired shit as "Profess this, fucktard" and "Chuck another green ball at me, I dare you.  I double dare you.  Chuck one more ball motha-shutyomouth".  (If you are hurting for inspiration, find a Sam Jackson soundboard.  Or Full Metal Jacket.  Tweak some of those and you have it.)

Care must be taken here that you don't talk over the raid leader's instructions.  Also, don't over do it.  Sometimes a one-liner is what the doctor ordered to release some tension and let everyone know that, hey, raiding is frustrating, but we're doing some fun shit too.  Also, you may need to censor yourself depending on your guild.  PuGs are probably not the place to do this, at least not right away.  Then again, it may make the night for someone.  You never know unless you try, and bottling it all up just isn't healthy.  Plus, there's nothing like some good smack to help unite you all against the common, shit-spawning foe.

So next time lady D-bag starts on her monologue and you're pulling trash, feel free to tell her to shut the hell up; she'll get hers.  Her and her little adds, too.

Next, the "Just For Me" category.
This post is all about honesty and letting it out.  Look at your man, then back at me. Now look at your man.  He's standing in a fire.  Yes, this happens.  Every. Raid.  Someone will do something completely dumb.  It may be all one person, or it may be spread around.  Everyone preaches: be nice, help them, teach them.

Forget that.  Scream at the top of your lungs.  Wake up your kids.  Call that person every name you can think of that ends in -ucker.  Like Mushroom and Swiss Burgerucker.  Just don't key this smack in.  Trust me, this is the deconstructive smack.  Sometimes, people are playing like idiots, and we should just call a spade a spade... in the privacy of our own home.  This helps if you have one other person you can bitch at.

Letting it out is good.  Holding it in is not.  Once you unleash the beast on the dust mites in your computer lab, then the healing can begin.  As long as you're holding it in, you're going to be nurturing resentment.  Just take care not to let this turn into repetitive talking smack about someone behind their back.  Say it once, then put it in a magical bubble and LET IT GO.  Personally, I'm more likely to ninja-yell at the tool belt that feels the urge to keep track of every mistake you've ever made and relate them at length in your ear than the poor sod who just didn't realize the goddamn red rope leads directly to the person you need to run towards.

Finally, the "Friendly Competition" category.
I'm a competitive guy.  I'm huge into sports.  I've talked about the strange double standard of sports v. raiding on here before.  One is socially acceptable to be obsessed with, the other is not.  They almost seem of two different worlds, but, really, they hold nearly everything in common.  You have fat basement dwelling nerds that play fantasy sports as often as you do playing video games.  Nothing about sports helps your complexion or your lisp.

My point here is that I take the same attitude on the court that I do in a raid.  My goal is always to win.  If we didn't win, I'm not happy.  I hate to lose.  I usually play at least twice a week on a men's league team in various sports (Basketball and softball mostly nowadays, but I've done flag football, disc golf, even ultimate Frisbee.  If there is a city league of it, I'll try it).  I try to raid a couple times a week as well.  I approach both with the same attitude.

In sports, it's not uncommon to talk a little smack.  In fact, that's often part of the game.  Even talking some smack to your teammates.  When Joe Everyman is just not pulling his weight on the basketball floor and I'm making it rain from the three point line, sometimes I just have to talk a little smack about it.  A lot of the times, Joe will step up and start playing harder to rise to the challenge, if only to shut me the hell up.  I'm not nasty about it; I don't question his manhood or anything.  I just simply make sure he's well aware of the quality of the masonry he's putting up.

The same thing can be useful in raiding.  I'm not a big meter spammer, but I will most definitely whisper other DPS that I know and brag a bit.  A lot of times, they'll try to get back at me on the next fight.  This engenders a little friendly competition that makes the night more fun, the raid more challenging, and the team better as a whole since we're putting out bigger numbers.

Like the other categories, you have to take care to not lose sight of the bigger goal.  I make sure when I'm talking smack that I not only talk about raw DPS, but raw DPS while doing my job.  I'm not standing in the fires or letting bone spikes half their way with my buddy's prostate.  I'm topping the chart while getting shit done.  A good way to make sure you do this is to treat it as a full night competition.  Often, different fights require different people to step up.  If there's one that favors your, there's probably one that favors your buddy.  Thus, you gotta make the most of your opportunities. 

To sum it up.
Whether you're Telling the Boss Off, Yelling In Private, or Prodding A Friend, smack talking is not all bad.  It has it's place just like any of the other spells in your spellbook.  Don't be afraid to put /cast Smack Talk on your action bar.  Bind that shit to your push to talk key.  Get it off your chest.  Just don't be an idiot about it.  Or rather, be an idiot, just not the idiot that makes everyone else want to talk smack.  It's a fine line, I know, but I can walk it.  Not my fault if you can't, you Smack Talk Failucker.  (Pronounced Fah-luck-er, wanna fight about it?).

Social Innovation and Alliances

Spinks wrote about Raid Alliances here. Check it out. My response is: Yes, Yes, emphatically YES!  What Spinks is talking about is how guilds are often formed based on friendships or common views on things, while raiding groups are often based on compatibility of time schedules, desire, and skill level.  History has shown us that finding a large group of people that share all of those things with you can be like Mankirk's Wife.  Also, at times, the two group ideologies seem diametrically opposed.  That is, your friends or people you get along with don't often have the same skill, schedule, or drive to raid that you do... but they're still your friends.  You still would like to spend time with them. 

What the current guild system does not take into account are the needs of a long-term, social environment.  People's goals are going to change over time.  It happens every day.  This doesn't mean we want to have to sever ties with one group in order to join another.  Additionally, people are members of multiple groups in RL all the time.  You can have two groups of friends.   Maybe one group is made up of friends that attend the same school as you and the other is a group of fellow hobbyists.  They could not share a member and yet your allegiance to each is equally valid.  That's how life works, but not WoW.

In WoW, we have to choose one group and only one group.  Hope your needs don't change.  Hope everyone sticks together, because all your souls are most assuredly in one shard.  There isn't room for change.

I lived this problem along with several close friends of mine and a whole host of alliance-mates.  We used to be officers in a casual, friendly guild.  The guild used to be quite large, but has seen it's numbers dwindle as all the good players hit a point where they need to leave in order to secure a raid spot (me included).  We love our guild, many of us still hang out on the same forum boards even though we're not official "members" any more.  The guild did not raid.  It just wasn't in the fabric of the membership.  We had a lot of different people with a lot of different schedules.   If we had ten people who wanted to raid, we could still only get 5 to show up on any given night.  It wasn't because the people didn't want to raid together, it was just that our schedules were all so different.  So, we left to pursue the interest that most required belonging to a guild.  Not friendship... raiding.

For a while, we did the raiding alliance thing.  It was great.  We had a group of people we raided with, regular raids, and we still had our friendly guild.  It was like having our cake and eating it too.  Then, I'm not sure what happened.  A group that started in late TBC found itself ripping apart at the seams mid-Wrath.  I could point to several key issues, but the bottom line is as Spinks mentions: the marked lack of support of the alliance paradigm from Blizzard.  It's not something they encourage.  They want everyone in their neat, little guild boxes, as emphasized by their plans for Cataclysm.

Now, I am not against the guild leveling stuff promised in the pipeline.  I think it'll probably be pretty cool and give some good incentive to stick with a group.  I'm not saying it's a gross oversight or anything, because maybe there isn't a good way to encourage alliances.  Maybe it wouldn't even work.  I don't know.  I can only say that by putting the emphasis on guilds so heavily, they're effectively debilitating any independent alliances.  The lack of support made it difficult in the first place, but with what's been foreshadowed, it will soon become untenable.  You will pretty much have to be in the guild where you're doing your raiding.

So where does that leave me now?  I've stepped down as an officer in a guild I was quite fond of.  It was heart wrenching, but I still have an alt there.  Ya know, to keep in touch.   I joined a small guild of ten awesome folks who are committed to the same schedule and raiding ideas.  There are no thoughts or talk of any sort of future alliance, as it has mostly dissolved.  People still stay in touch and ask for help for their guild runs, but, for the most part, we were forced to go our separate ways.

As an aside, I'm not knocking my current guild.  I love these people; they've become some of my best friends not only in-game, but in RL too.  We all sort of live in the same area, so we can meet up, help each other with RL problems as well as in-game ones.  It's a great little guild.  We have similar ideas and senses of humor.  We're like any little clique you've ever known.  We have our drama, we have our good times.  It's rather awesome and I'm happy to be there.

My point is: why did I have to choose?  Why couldn't my "main" be in two guilds, for instance?  Maybe you could designate "social" guild and "raiding" guild?  Maybe we could have had a supported alliance, with features to make it more palatable.  Half of our current raid team is made up of folks who, like me, had to leave the old guild for the new.  It just made sense.  We got sick of kludging together random chat channels, separate banks, calendars, etc... it just didn't work.  Raiding takes a lot of organization, and you really need to be in the same guild to capitalize on the tools that Blizz has given us. 

We tried a big alliance, we tried a small alliance.  In the end, the lack of support forced our hand.  That seems to be what Blizzard wants, though I'm sure they wouldn't put it quite like that. 

I don't want to sound too ranty though, because it still has worked out rather well for me. I'm excited about the guild leveling, and generally happy where I am now.   I know that Blizzard can't do it all.  I chalk it up to a "personal decision" that was difficult, but the right one for the direction our gaming has taken us.  However, Spinks's post, aptly titled "What Could Have Been", made me really think about, ya know, what could have been.  Maybe it would have been possible to have our cake and eat it too in some crazy parallel universe of online gaming.

As MMO's gain longevity, we will inevitably need to see innovation in the social aspect of the genre.  The concept of a "guild" has been around for quite some time, and perhaps we're seeing that it's becoming outdated.  As social gaming becomes more main stream, we'll have to find better ways to accommodate the "human factor".  That is, we need to allow for change, because that's sort of what we humans do over time.  We learn, we grow, we alter our perceptions.  I, for one, would pay a lot of money for a game that finds a way to embrace our fickleness without short-changing the relationships.  Seems like a pretty tall order though.

Goin' Slummin'? Thanks, But No Thanks.

During my time spent in WoW, I, like the rest of you, have had occasion to encounter a wide range of behavioral types.  Being somewhat of a psychology geek (or is that nerd? or dweeb? Jbelle?), I usually view a lot of these types with a bit of a clinical detachment, holding myself aloof from the drama.  Most would say I have a rather high tolerance for things that can be quite annoying or even downright rude.  Hence why I don't write a whole lot about failed PuGs and getting ninja'ed and such.  I'm the type that wants to find the source of the behavior and puzzle it out, fix it maybe.  In another life, I was probably a decent shrink.

Despite my compartmentalization of issues and natural immunity (+15) to behavioral issues, I have my weak spots the same as anyone else.  There are just some types that bug the hell out of me.  I'm sure this isn't a surprise because, after all, everyone has their own peculiarities and proclivities.  Even Superman has Kryptonite, and my behavioral Kryptonite takes the form of a pattern found in some (not all) hardcore gamers.

I'm not even sure what to name the pattern, but I can certainly describe the symptoms:

• The player thinks they are better than everyone else.  They probably raided hardcore before, but have since backed off, so they still consider themselves "hardcore".
• Since they've backed off, they're now stuck with us "casuals".  They're not playing with their current group by choice, rather it's just the best they can do.
• They are not an open asshat.  This isn't the person who is a blatant classist or immature prick.  In fact, in their mind they probably think they are the most mature, well-adjusted person in the game.
• They see casual gaming as really the "second tier" of the gaming status hierarchy.  These folks couldn't possibly put the same amount of thought/preparation into an encounter as a hardcore group because they're not hardcore, right?
• They believe they are the all-star of any group they join that isn't hardcore.  After all, they have the experience, so they're obviously the best.  It's not something they try to rub in, but you know, and they know, and everyone should act accordingly.
• They often overcompensate for any perceived "harshness" as if the casual player were a fragile creature that cannot possibly understand the intricacies of true raiding.  Thus, all wisdom is related in a patronizing manner, but it is not meant to be mean... it's just all us fragile casuals can handle.

I think that paints a rough sketch of what I'm talking about.  Surely you've encountered someone like this before.  I guess I'd label it the Fish Out Of Water Syndrome.  Like Donny, this person is most clearly out of their element when it comes to grouping with casuals.  FOOWS is not something that every "harder" core player exhibits, only a select few, and it bugs the shit out of me. 

I mean, I don't consider myself the best player out there, but I generally feel that I'm pretty competent.  I like to think I know my class, and can understand raid encounters.  After all, I blog about it damn near every day.  I can't be that dumb, can I?  (Shut up, Jbelle).  There are certainly things I miss or don't do correctly, but, on the whole, I'm doing just fine, thanks. 

For some reason, the individual playing with FOOWS just thinks everything they do is so damn smart and good.  They couldn't possibly have made a mistake; it's always someone else.  They often try to blow smoke and sunshine up your ass, because all casuals need their fragile e-peens stroked so that they can confidently fail and perhaps stumble into success.  The problem is, they are so out of touch with reality, that the smoke and sunshine fail to become anything more than smoke and sunshine.  We all know you're full of shit.  I think we'd rather you just came out and said: "Hey, you twats, you guys suck and I'm good and if you did everything my way we'd win."  The false front drives me nuts.

I guess the core problem is just that I dislike "fake" people.  I prize honesty a great deal, and think it's condescending when someone tries to BS me.  I'm generally a smart guy, and I can see what's going on just as well as you can.  The fact that I don't have the time to play 40+ hours a week, doesn't make me unintelligent.  It just makes me casual, and casual does not equal dumb.  Not always anyways.  A lot of us so-called casuals (by playtime) spend a lot more time researching and reading to make up for our lack of time and experience.  Hence the success of my ICC group.  We only raid two hours for one night a week, but we succeed more than we fail because we spend a lot of time preparing and discussing via emails and what-have-you.

The whole FOOWS thing reminds me of when guys I know used to talk about "goin' slummin'".   I don't know if you've ever heard that phrase, but it can mean a lot of different things.  The basic gist behind them all is that you're going to spend some time with people who are beneath you in some manner.  Usually it's with a very selfish goal in mind, but it doesn't mean you're going to be an asshole about it.  In fact, it often implies a vast amount of falseness in order to "fit in".  Done well, a lot of people can be fooled and really do think they're "lucky" to have such an auspicious person in their midst. 

It's like the Lord who takes time out of his day to be with the Commoners, but doesn't do it out of a sense of altruism or anything, but because he thinks he's gracing them by his presence.  He never forgets that he's a Lord, and he never lets the Commers forget it either.  There's no sense of equality, but obviously the Commoners are benefiting greatly (as much as the Lord from all the fawning).

I suppose my aim here is to just try to describe one of my recurring social issues in the game.  Being a successful casual raiding group from way back in TBC, we've seen a lot of FOOWS sufferers pass through our ranks.  Inevitably there is drama and hard feelings, but usually it just ends up in each party going their separate ways.  It's sort of sad, because it is just such a part of who these people are that there is no way you could talk some sense into them.  They will refuse to see how their behavior could be causing friction.  It's textbook denial. 

So how do you deal with a person like this?  How do you smooth the friction they inevitably cause?  After all, they're usually a good player and can offer a lot to the group in terms of experience, but do you sacrifice the good will and togetherness of a group for high numbers and boss strats?  It's a tough call for a raid leader, since such a person can be a great asset, yet also a great liability.  For my part, I think I've just tried to encourage honesty.  Sometimes it blows up and changes need to be made, but if you aren't ever honest with someone, then you're never giving them a chance.  Maybe they can change their FOOWS ways.  Or, maybe you should just melt them with your laser eyes and get on with saving the World... of Warcraft.

An Open Invitation For Advice

So I've recently found myself in a situation, and I want the interwebs' advice on how to handle it. However, I don't want to make it completely RL-boring for you guys, so I'm going to try to describe the problem in WoW frame of reference. We'll see how this goes. (Thus, this is an actual RL situation, definitely not an in-game issue, but I think the parallels will be perfect).

Say for a moment that for the last three years, you've been involved with a moderately successful raid group.  This group is pretty hardcore, requiring some time nearly every night of the week.  You're not always raiding, but you have to do a lot of preparation, so a lot of time goes into that: learning strats, making sure you've got the materials you need, etc.  It's pretty stressful on you, your wife (a fellow gamer who is not part of the group, but is supportive), and your life in general, but you also really enjoy the nights you raid, and don't always mind the preparation so much.  Still, you almost never get an "off" day because if you don't do the little things, you don't get to attend the raids.  In other words, it's not like you can just take a night off to go to dinner with your wife, or to get stuff done around the house. There's always something you'd have to work around.

Now, this is not "just a game" to you, so that excuse won't work here.  It's not your job, it's not your family... it's a hobby, but it's a hobby that means something to you and is important.  It's a hobby you made a commitment to three years ago to be there and do this stuff.  You knew what you were getting into.

Also, this hobby really only effects three months of the year.  It's not perpetual.  Let's say, for our analogy, it's like a hardcore raid group that can clear all the content in three months.  So you come together for three months, work your butts off to clear the content, and then the rest of the year go your separate ways.  Some of you may still play the game on your own while others go play other games.  You can still PuG and stuff, but the group doesn't officially come back together until the same time next year, when you'll be put through the wringer again.

So for three months, it really dominates your life.  You still get your sleep, get to work on time, and you have an hour or two of leisure per night... it pretty much ties up 3 hours after work, every night, with the raid nights taking the whole evening (lets say two per week).  Also, you can't really travel during this time because you're playing on a PC (not a laptop), so you're really stuck at home or confined to short weekend day trips.

Finally, you're not the raid leader.  However, you are an individual class leader (this is a larger raid, 25-mans for the purpose of this analogy), so that's part of your investment.  You were selected to be a class leader for your expertise, and you can't really turn that down.  You can't just be a normal raider, those spots are filled.  They need you as a class leader.

Now, you're three years into this gig, having mostly proven yourself and earned the trust of both the regular raiders and your raid leader.  You're a valued member of the team.  Heck, next year they're even thinking about letting you raid lead one of the "just for gear" raids.  That's a pretty cool step up for you.

However, you're a bit burnt out (not on the game, but on your affiliation with this group and what it demands).  You never wanted this to become a job, and it's feeling more like a job with each passing year.  You still really care about the group and it's success as a whole.  What's more you really care about all of the raiders.  They're friends or fellow warriors.  You've gone to battle together.  You've been through some shit together.  These are people you don't lightly leave in the lurch.

You're not sure you want to do it again, and it's a lot of time for something you're unsure of.  You think it might be nice if they let you scale back your involvement a bit, yet still raid, but there is no guarantee they'll let you.  In fact, it would almost certainly leave them short-handed for leaders.

Soon, you are scheduled for a one-on-one meeting with the raid leader to discuss the future of the group (he has these meetings with each class lead).  What do you do?  Do you lay it all out there, knowing it might leave him short handed and he might get angry with you, questioning your dedication to the group (because some people view "stepping back" that way, especially other leaders)?  Do you suck it up and hope another leader steps up so you can graciously hand the reigns over to them?  Do you back out entirely because any hobby is not worth such consternation?

Personally, I think I'm just going to be honest with the leader and let the chips fall where they may.  I've always believed honesty is the best policy in raid groups and beyond.  Still, it's not always easy to be honest.  Especially when you care about the group and would be very upset to have your dedication questioned.  It's a group I really care about and don't want to abandon, but it's really hard to put in all the time too.  I mean, I really want to have my cake and eat it too here.  I want to be involved, but on my terms, as it fits my schedule.  However, life rarely works like that, does it?

So interwebs, I ask you, what's your advice?

Happy Anniversary Generations

On Tuesday, our guild turned 5.  Yep, that's right, the guild has been there since a couple days after WoW began.  That's a long time for a guild.  Fuu and I joined up almost two years ago, and in the last two years alone there have been a metric ton of changes.  We've also seen our fair share of drama, but the guild has endured, thanks mostly to our fantastic guild leader who amazes us with her inner strength in the face of adversity each day (she's there for us while also being there for her child with Leukemia, amazing story, but not really mine to tell).  So thanks go to Kianna and all the other Gens out there who have made our game possible.

We did a short little run from Goldshire to Ratchet via Booty Bay and then got a pic on the surrounding hillside.  To finish things off, our GM had a vendetta against one Scout Manslayer.  She wouldn't tell us why, but we suspect a fishing trip gone bad.  In any case, we exacted our revenge. 

A Dish Best Served Cold, Unlike Turkey

And to everyone else out there: HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

A Change Of Pace

Some nights, when raiding, you're all business. Others, well, not so much. I've written recently about raiding "off-nights", but what about when the off night is intentional? That is to say, as raid lead, what if you approach the night with a far more relaxed attitude?

Such was the case on Tuesday. I logged on fifteen minutes before raid time, expecting just to be gobbled up in the run and sit back and DPS. I've been busy at work, busy with football, and just generally busy in life. Not the good kind of busy either. Not like: "Whoa! Where has this week gone?" No, this was more like: "Will you PAlease get off my a$$ already?" -or- "Seriously? Why the frack would you do that?!" It happens sometimes.

So I log in looking forward to standing in the back with my sissy robe (which was a great blog by the way, and it's author has now moved here) only to be informed that I've been promoted to raid leader for the night. When you're known as a raid leader, every once in a while you get the nod. It happens. "Bring in the righty!" they screamed at me, and I jogged out of the bullpen with my head high, fighting the rising urge within me to vomit and return to the safety of the 'pen. It was game time and I needed to put on my game face.

Or did I?

Since I wasn't really in the correct mood and certainly not prepared to lead, I decided to approach this night a little differently. I signaled this intention on the first fight (flame levi) by saying: "Go wherever you want and stand by a vehicle, we'll see what we don't have and just go from there." So it was going to be one of those nights.

We'd been having a lot of drama lately, and I think everyone needed a relaxed, lets-just-do-this-and-not-worry-about-being-smart kind of night. It wasn't exactly an "off-night" since we didn't play horribly. We just didn't spend a whole lot of time discussing things or figuring our who's best for what. We just went and did it. I'd like to think that many people enjoyed this slight change of pace, but the reality is that I'm sure a good chunk of the group were frustrated by my lack of characteristically heavy handed leadership. It's not that I'm usually a micro-manager, because I don't really believe in that style, but I'm usually a lot more prepared and attentive.

I just went with it.

Instead of trying to force myself into the ol' shoe box, I just sort of let things happen. People chatted, there was a moderate amount of confusion, and we wiped a few times on the crazy cat lady plus one shameful time onRazorscale (due to enrage and being a couple DPS short of a full group). It wasn't perfect, but I hope it was fun for the people that desperately needed a "fun run". While some people may miss the structure, others can flourish in the freedom. Different strokes for different folks, amirite?

There may be some wisdom in what I did. There may be some folly. However, it is what it is and, for once, I resisted the urge to over-analyze it. I just played. Think about it next time you're feeling frustrated. An "off night" doesn't have to be horrible and frustrating... sometimes you can just go with it. Sometimes going out and doing instead of talking is preferable.

Even after several cat lady wipes, I was surprised when a majority of the raid wanted to continue fighting her. It's a frustrating fight to begin with, but I think we didn't let it get to us. We were being laid back. It was nice to see. I was perfectly prepared to go on to one of the easier fights, as much as I hate to do such a thing.

The people spoke, then the people went back and whacked that bitch. It was really a momentous moment in an otherwise run-of-the-mill night. It made me proud about our group again, and pride was something we'd been missing lately.

We didn't get a lot done in a short time, if you measure by bosses. However, if you measure by morale, I'm hoping we turned a small slide around. Only time will tell.

(P.S. - there was a small update I put in my AI post from Tuesday... times are official now)

Chemistry and Life Lessons, Sort Of

This post is going to be a mixture of Aion and WoW, read on at your own peril. Molarity of the mixture? We'll litmus test when we're done.

Molarity, for those who weren't chem nerds in HS, speaks of the concentration of an acid or base. If you have a hydrochloric acid with a high molarity, for instance, you probably want to add some water to dilute that before pouring it in something corruptible. Like your soul.

The litmus test is used to measure the strength of an acid or base. It doesn't really tell you molarity or any other type of concentration other than the pH of the liquid. It is also used colloquially to mean "benchmark". I sort of stretch the usage here in tandem with molarity in order to provide a sort of "chemistry joke".

Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

That, and explaining jokes mean the joke was terribad in the first place, so I probably just wasted what little attention I grabbed. Sue me. It's Monday. And I want to corrupt things. Like this table. If I had some high molar acid right now... *sigh*

In any case, this opening exchange between myself and... myself illustrates how my WoW time has been spent recently. That is to say, I've been feeding rationality and science to the drama llama to no avail, then getting angry and wanting to melt faces. Sometimes, I just melt the faces by pulling out the old electric guitar that sits next to my computer and annoying the shit out of my wife. Sometimes I just muse stealing souls and setting things on fire. Only one is really warlocky so I'll try to stick to that frame of mind.

Jessabelle writes somewhat about what's going on (with more to follow). The short version is that we, as an alliance, were apparently woefully unprepared to deal with the new 2-hour trade rule. It brings a lot of interesting new looting options to the table that our creative membership have demonstrated. Some of which could be seen as less than honest. The less-than-honest-seeming is what we're dealing with, along with the rankled feathers that go with that. It's not a new fight, the loot stuff, it's just a new twist. It's also one that people don't seem to deal with very well. Has anyone else experienced problems with this? It seems like we're alone, but I find that hard to believe. I mean, we're not the only one with crafty individuals...

In any case, my WoW time has been limited in part because of the Aionic Open Beta, but also because I've been trolling forums, locking threads, responding to tells, yadda yadda... thus not feeling very excited about signing on. It's good to step back sometimes, and we're not abandoning our charges by any means, but I think Jess and I have both been through this crap enough to know that sometimes we just need to step back and let it run it's course. It's good to drop an opinion off at the pool, but usually people will just watch it float on by anyways.

We will get it figured out. We have good people on it. Some people will remain upset and not play with some other people. Some people might leave. Such is the way of the drama llama. I hate to minimize the issue, because it really does mean something to me and I get emotional about it, but sometimes you have to remember that this, too, shall pass.

Hmm, this has gone on long enough and I'm being pulled into a meeting (no one willingly attends meetings, it's only through an un-resistable Death Grip that we attend), thus I'm going to leave this post highly acidic... or WoWic and counter it with some Aionic tomorrow. For now, check out Spooner's vids. Good stuff and I was actually on while he was making some of them. I won't show up in any cuz I was much lower, but there was chatting. I look forward to rolling with these guys upon launch, which is only a week away now!

On Lifetapping, Extended Raid IDs, and the Emblem Changes

When scrolling through the patch notes the other day, I apparently missed this little gem:

Glyph of Lifetap: Duration of the buff from this glyph increased to 40 seconds.

That's a pretty huge increase and will be awesome I think. I'm pretty certain you should be able to fit a lifetap comfortably in your rotation every 40 seconds. In fact, I would wager that it's almost necessary on a boss fight to prevent going OOM. The key is to space them out to keep the buff up while minimizing how often you need to do it so you don't hurt your DPS. I'm thinking, for me, it'll probably end up being a tap about every other pass through the rotation.

Your goal should be to end a boss encounter, having never gone OOM throughout, as near as possible to empty on mana, minimizing your downtime. On a perfect encounter, you'd be able to sprinkle life taps into your rotation within 40 seconds (but as close to 40 seconds apart as you can), slowing your mana drain to end the fight with your last cast consuming your last mana. That'd be nearly impossible to gauge, as there are so many variables, but if you keep that goal in mind, you can probably hone your skills a bit. This change may increase the usefulness of talenting the "improved life tap" since the fewer taps you have to do, the better... especially if you can space them out to keep that buff up.

Still, the idea holds that you don't want to put too much emphasis on keeping this buff up that you let DoTs drop off or stray from the basics. It's the icing on the cake, not the cake itself.

In other news, I ran the new Crusader dailies last night, and they're pretty fun. Nothing ground breaking, but the new landing area up north is decently interesting. If you can catch it, there is a crazy Lurker-like boss that spits at some dudes on a boat. I'm not quite sure what that is all about yet, but it's cool looking. Blizz is also setting the stage for the Black Knight's return, though you could probably guess as much from the patch notes. Still, I think I expected something a bit more epic to that end, but it was really just investigative grunt work. In any case, I like the long, over-arching story lines, so I'm not going to trash on it.

My first purchase was to pick up the tabard that'll let me "hearth" it to the tournament grounds. Totally going to be worth it as I plan to do the dailies at least until I can upgrade my squire. They did put in a summoning stone to facilitate getting groups to the instances, but I think it'll still be nice to be able to teleport there on my own as well. I look forward to running some heroics and testing out the new emblem system. Conquest emblems hit me right where I need it, as we aren't near putting Ulduar on farm and I've not gotten a whole lot of gear upgrades from there. Thus, the items purchasable with the Conquest emblems are a good upgrade for me.

I think the ID and emblem changes are really casual guild friendly. Say what you want about "easy mode" or whatever, but as an officer it really opens a lot of doors for me. What with the summer exodus and just normal guild atrophy, we've been a lot smaller as of late, raiding only with our alliance. We also probably couldn't commit to more than one 10-man day per week. Before, there wasn't a lot of interest in running nightly heroics or starting a 10-man team because you couldn't really get anywhere with that. However, with extending raid IDs and getting emblems from heroics, this allows us to progress at our own pace, not forcing us into a repetitive weekly cycle. We can actually get somewhere!

Needless to say, I think this may re-energize our guild and lead to a lot more group work, which can only be good. I would suspect a lot of small to medium sized guilds find themselves in the same boat. I know you can make cases about the negatives of the moves Blizz has made, but I'm going to go ahead and side on the positive for these changes. From where I'm sitting, it's a smart move and done well. I just wish they had seen fit to offer the extra server capacity needed for the sudden onslaught of heroic instancing. We wanted to get in and run a quick VH, but definitely couldn't as "additional instances could not be launched at this time". That sort of messages makes me want to set fire to baby bunnies. Granted, that's just plain fun, but all the same...

In any case, we're going back into Ulduar tonight, and I'm really hoping my addons are functional, or it could get messy. Of course this weekend is extremely busy for me, so I won't get to spend the quality time with the patch that I'd like to. I'm hoping next week to have experienced the new PvP stuff, analyzed my DK respec, and thus be able to write about that a bit, so stay tuned if that's your thing. That's where the real changes are anyways. Also, it'd be REALLY nice to get into some 5-mans, maybe even the new one, but some of that may be dependent on servers. Ugh.

Diff'rent Strokes

In case you're unfamiliar with the situation comedy, here's a plot summary: The misadventures of a rich Manhattan family who adopted the children of their late African American maid. (Thanks Imdb!). In addition, recall the saying: "Different strokes for different folks". Both are generally applicable in today's continuation of the trend started yesterday. I promise I'll move on to a different topic soon, but I feel that nearly everyone has gone through summer turmoil before, and I'm hoping some of our current struggles can be moderately helpful (or at least entertaining).

Let's start with the challenge. J-belle over at Miss Medicina *didn't* issue a challenge to me to explain my Top-Down approach to righting the ship that is our alliance. So, I'm *not* going to write about it. (In reading her article, you'll notice that perhaps I'm displaying a bit of beardishness here...)

So what's all this about taking the maid's kids? Well, that sort of describes my guild well. We're like a sitcom. We have a mish-mash of folks who probably have no reason belonging together. Half the time, the guild chat is in French. I don't speak French. Sometimes I'll reply in German, which I do speak. As you can guess, it can be chaotic. Additionally, J-belle writes from the perspective of a small, one game guild full of people who are geocentrally located.

Generations is a guild that exists across games and oceans. We have a sister guild on the EU servers that is actually more of the hardcore raiding time. If it's an MMO, someone on our forums plays it. Our guild existed before WoW. It's creepy to think about, but it's a great support network. We don't really recruit so much as people "fall into" us and find out that they can never leave (*evil cackle*). The point here is just that, we're probably the antithesis of J-belle's guild. At the focal point of these epic differences are J-belle and myself. If we met in a scissor fight, I'd probably cut off her wings on principle alone (Thanks Incubus). Then again, I am a warlock. The only wings I like are demonic.

The lesson to take from this part is that there is absolutely no way that J-belle and I could be friends if we didn't know how to communicate with one another. Sure, it's a disfunctional, nerd-rage embellished, referentially comedic, often misunderstood type of communication... but we speak the same language. Communication is the key to making any relationship last through adversity. No news here.

So what about this "Top Down" approach? Well, I'm a firm believer in leading by example. I would never ask someone to do something that I wouldn't first do myself. In-game, this means I think that any solution to a problem must first start with the officers. While J-belle would focus on the members, stepping back and collecting questionnaires, I'm swiftly revisiting policy and making sure we have the right people in the right leadership positions. Both are equally valid and neccessary approaches.

In a big guild, you can't really get everyone's opinion. Everyone may not even be on at the same time, and even if you could, there'd be so many differences that you'd end up muddling the issue more than one person could handle. In a big guild, you have to sometimes make those "executive decisions" and deal with the consequences later. It's my experience that most people crave leadership. They want to be led. They want to know what direction we're going and how we're going to get there in a nice, neat google map. Step by step, put it in your envelope and be done with it. It's this perspective that colors my approach different from that of a small guild.

The small guild can ask everyone, maybe even have everyone vote, and pat everyone on the back and call it a day. You get personal attention in a small guild. In the big guild, you have to make your own satisfaction. Some people don't want the attention. They just want to have options and be left alone to play their game. They want to be social some time, but not all the time. They want to have resources, but also fend for themselves. It's a tricky tightrope in it's own right.

Sometimes you have to just make the tough decisions. Sometimes a quick decision is better than an "over-discussed" decision. You can please some of the people all of the time, or all of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time. In a big guild, you might lose some people, you might gain some people. It happens. It hurts, but it happens. We've always kept an "open-door" policy to try to steer clear of drama. Sometimes people come for a while, and then want to go do the hardcore raiding thing for a while, or some friends just started a guild, or whatever. That's fine, we'll be here if it fails, and we'll still run with you if it succeeds. We're like a rock (Thanks Bob Seger).

In this environment, a group is only going to be as good as their leader. You need leaders that are engaged and available. You need to be able to hear criticism and make the right decision, even if it earns you flak. You must lead by example. If you act like an asshat, you're gonna have 150 other asshats following you. However, if you try to be a class act, you're going to have more members striving to be a class act too. People look up to leaders, whether or not it's warranted. If your members are all whining and bitching, then you probably are too (and in J-belle's case, that might be your "thing", which is okay. Sometimes that works for people. Persistance and stubbornness are just spelled differently).

So yes, my approach is different. However, at the end of the day, we both have the same goal: to nuture our relationships with the people we care about, and succeed at the challenges set before us. As long as we can communicate with each other, then we can work together towards these goals, even if we're coming from completely different ends of the spectrum. In a way, that's better for the alliance as a whole, since we can cater to all types of players. If you want what J-belle is selling, she's got you covered. She does a great job of representing her guildies. If you're liking what I'm laying down, we have room for that too.

Having two officers with completely opposing viewpoints can be a great asset as long as they know how to communicate and respect each other. If you're mature about it, you can really do some awesome things, not only in-game, but out in the world as well. Too often we see people who believe in different things and we reject them. We think: there's no damn way I could ever be friends with that person. Relationships are funny like that though. Sometimes they don't give a shit what you think. Sometimes a little tolerance can go a long way towards an understanding. Sometimes you can agree to disagree and still enjoy one another's company immensely.

And sometimes, you just may learn something in the process.

For The Alliance!

Nope, not the achievement. Something much more near and dear to my heart.

It's no secret around here that I've been raid leading and doing a lot of work for both my alliance and my guild. I’m heavily invested in both, so this post should make sense in that light. Our guild leader is one of the most amazing women I've ever met. Her daughter has been fighting cancer for over two years now, and she's not even a teenager yet. It's a very sad story that we share with her on a daily basis, yet she remains positive and strong. Her story inspires guild members that span multiple games.

I bring this up because what most people don't see about our guild is that we're a family of sorts, especially those of us who have been there for a while. We've had a lot of upheaval and people leaving, but our GM has really been the one shining example. She's tried to give others the leadership a couple of times, but we won't take it. Even if she only pops in for a half hour a night... or week, she's our leader. It's that simple. I know several people that would, no joke, stand in a black circle of death for her... ON PURPOSE. (That's true love in WoW, you know).

In any case, the point here is just that we have a very unique guild situation. We've been around since day 1 of WoW and don't plan to go anywhere. We've raided, we've not raided, we've laughed, we've cried. We're honest with each other. Like a family, we may have fights, but we stick it out together, for richer or poorer. “Once a Gen, always a Gen” is the motto that holds true to this day.

I really wanted to bring that same feeling of family to our raiding alliance. Perhaps the ONLY reason I raid is because I'm addicted to the sense of camaraderie that goes with going into battle together (something I find as a football coach as well). I say it like that, because that's how I feel about it: going into battle. Some people see pixels on a screen, some buttons to press, and a good time. I see 10 or 25 people, dressed in armor, ready to lay down their lives for each other (if you’ve ever been part of a football team, you know where I’m coming from on this).

Extreme? Perhaps. But I don't think it's completely off the wall, because isn't that what we do? Lay down our lives for each other? Each of us has plenty going on. My GM with her kid, I’m planning a wedding. There are plenty who take time out of their lives for this. Single parents who spend their "free" nights with us in glorious battle. Coupled parents who do the same. Wife aggro sometimes gets us more than mob aggro. Parents, money, work, and school have crit on us quite a bit over the years. The point is: we put our lives TO THE SIDE to be with each other.

Sure, sure, RL has to come first. We all know this fundamental rule of gaming. But to some of us, it means just a little more. Some of my greatest stories of inspiration come from this "game". It's not that you let your life fall to pieces, but it IS worth making time for. It IS worth sacrificing for. At least in my guild it is. We don't ask anyone to take time out of their day for us; they do it because we're worth it to each other. My GM signs on every night, nobody asks her to, nobody requires it. She does it because we're her family outside of family. We're a support network. We're a shoulder to cry on. We’re there for each other. It’s just the right thing to do. We don’t need to beg.

I wanted to bring that to our alliance.

For a while, I think we had it. Especially in the TBC days, we were a pretty tight knit group. Then, as with all good things, some bad things happened to us. We faced some adversity. I'd like to say that, as a family, we pulled through it together, but this story is not over yet. As things stand now, we're hovering shakily over a precipice of epic proportions. Where did we go wrong?

It starts, as always, with the little things: miscommunications and misunderstandings. They fester and grow unseen. People begin to get unhappy. Then you lose an officer without an explanation, or maybe two, and the remaining officers start pointing fingers. They struggle frantically to discover what WAS the problem. Why are we here? Who screwed this up? People get hurt. Good people. People who were like family.

Yet still, "it's just a game", right? It should be all fun, all the time. If it isn't fun, then why be here?

It's at this point when we begin to realize, maybe it isn't "just a game". Maybe these relationships are real. After all, the pain is all too real.

So what do you do when the going gets tough? Do you quit? Do you retreat? It’s even easier to do this in an alliance, because, after all, they’re not your guildies. You can just take your ball and go home, focus on your own guild and nuts to the rest of your crazies. But you really have to ask yourself, are these people worth it?

Sometimes the answer may be no, and that’s okay. Be honest about it. People can go separate ways and still be friends. However, for me, the answer is yes. These people are too good just to quit on, and I've thrown my lot in with them. I'm not cooking up stuff on the side, me and my guild are dedicated to making it work. Maybe it stems from that sense of family. I’ve always believed that, with the right team, you can work through anything. It's not about me, it's about us.

My father once told me: “Don’t be part of the problem, be part of the solution.” If everyone asks themselves what they can do to be part of the solution, your team will more than likely succeed. It has to start somewhere.

The first step to healing any wound is getting over the past. You can’t change what’s been done, and it doesn’t really matter who did it. What matters is how you’re going to fix it together (if it’s worth it: a decision you have to make for yourself). This holds true for just about any relationship. Whether you’re married, engaged, in a bar, or in a raid. Get over it, and get on with it. Work together. Don’t be part of the problem.

I really hope my alliance can do this, because they’re worth it.

You've Got To Know When To Hold 'Em...

Know when to fold 'em.
Know when to walk away.
Know when to run...

If you haven't heard "The Gambler" by Kenny Rogers ever, then my little intro probably doesn't make a whole lot of sense. However, it's a great song even if you're not a big Kenny fan and iconic in many ways.

In the song, Kenny is comparing life to a poker game, but here I'd like to extend that analogy to WoW. We've seen a lot of atrophy in the blogosphere over the last few months, with Stop at The Stoppable Force being the latest that I'm aware of. Each of these folks decided to "walk" or even "run" in some cases, but in all cases, I think they were burnt out on the game.

So how do we fight "burn out"? It's a term common enough among gamers, clearly connoting a sense of fatigue with one's current activities. Bloggers are prime candidates for this particular non-warlocky affliction too. We strive to stay current and entertaining, which means we have to spend enough time in-game or reading about the game to generate content. Some folks are better at this than others, but all of us spend quality time with it. It's something that's important to us.

This puts us at high risk for "burn out", because it can often seem very hard to step back and take a break. However, I think being able to know when to take breaks is a key skill for any gamer, be they hardcore or casual. Each of us have our own limits to what we can endure, but we all have a definite limit. It's important to know your limit, be honest with yourself about it, and work within your responsibilities to not constantly push your limits.

As an officer, raid leader, sometimes substitute GM, blogger, aspiring writer (yes, I write other things than just here and would love to make a career of it, however it's kind of on par with "pro athlete" as far as I'm concerned, which brings us to), athlete and football coach, future husband, and valued "team member" at work... my plate is pretty full at all times. I'd imagine a lot of gamers juggle similar loads. Toss in a few kids or school and you probably feel me. The point is that gamers are usually "doers" in life. The same compulsion that drives us to complete every damned achievement we can and research our specs and read blogs probably drives us to take large loads on ourselves in other areas as well.

We need to be aware of this tendency in ourselves and be honest enough to give ourselves a break when we need it. I do this a lot of ways. I play another MMO (EvE online), I mix up PvP and PvE (though I like PvE a lot more), I have a min/max toon and a "fun toon", I take nights off to go play basketball or softball... to name a few. What do you enjoy? How do you change it up and take breaks? I still probably log in just about every night, but I don't run myself ragged trying to do everything.

I view WoW and MMO's in general as more of a marathon. It's something I want to build up over a few years. That's what I like about it. If I wanted to "beat" the game in a month or two, I'd get a console game (and I do play console games quite often). As with all marathons, pacing yourself is the key. This is my plea to bloggers and gamers in general... don't be afraid to pace yourself. Gaming has grown up, and our attitudes need to reflect that.

I think I've rambled enough for today. I didn't do much besides casual PvP in-game last night, hence using this general topic today for content. In a way, that is a break too. So are lazy link days and pictures :-).

Setting A Gear Limit: The Easy Way Out?

One of my alliance-mates, commenter, and fellow Harry Potter enthusiast shot me a good writing prompt yesterday. Here's what she wrote:

Here is an interesting question you might want to address (Wow, look at me giving you prompts!). Should casual guilds/alliances have absolute gear requirements for raids? Such as Ulduar, or even Eye of Eternity? For example, should we require anyone who wants to raid Ulduar to have the "Superior" achievement, or all items item level 200+ (and make exceptions for things like trinkets maybe? hmm.) This is something I've been thinking about lately, as we get closer to Ulduar. Plus, a few of us tried to do EoE over the weekend, and it went very badly.
-jbelle

This is an interesting question, indeed. When is it okay or even expected to have "gear requirements"? I think traditionally this is seen as a "hardcore" approach to raiding, but with the increased accessibility of the WotLK raids, it is likely a question some "casual" guilds are asking themselves. I think the answer to this question is really two-fold.

The first question we'd need to answer is:

What does requiring a certain gear level really do for you?

If we're going to entertain the idea of introducing a gear requirement for our raids, it's only logical that you first identify the benefit of doing so. On the surface, this is simple: you need to have certain gear to be successful at a certain level of raiding. That is to say, you certainly can't walk into EoE with quest blues and greens and expect to do anything other than fall flat on your face. However, where would you draw the line?

You see, it's been my experience that there are players who "outperform" their gear. I think we've all been in a group with some guy who we inspect and see... ew, this guy's a noob. Then they proceed to beat the guy decked out in purples of the same class. Or you are getting your butt kicked on the charts by another guy and think, well he's obviously over geared. Then you inspect them and fell bad about yourself for a week before vowing to change your spec/class/playstyle. Whatever the case may be, these folks just surprise you with their ability to perform in low quality gear.

On the flip side, you have folks who are epic'ed out and can't beat the tanks on the DPS charts. We've all seen that guy too and just shake our heads in frustration. Especially when you point them to several very good resources and they appear to have the temperament of an angry mule (yes, that is a veiled way of calling them an 'asshat').

The problem here arises that if you were to draw a "line" based on success, you'd have to draw two different lines. How does one take skill into account here? For me, this is the first thing that sort of breaks gear requirements. You're going to really have to make a judgement call based on player skill anyways. So, what are you really gaining? I suppose in the case of our casual guild, it gives us a non-offensive way of denying people who don't belong in the raid. If someone tells you that you're not "good enough", well that sucks and can make for some drama. However, if you just say "your gear isn't good enough", well then, that seems to be a lot easier to accept and correct than "your skill isn't good enough". So basically, you're really just gaining an "out" as a raid leader or making the decision easier.

The second question we need to ask ourselves is:

Is such a rule helpful or even appropriate for a "casual" guild/alliance?

The reason that this is the second question is because you really have to be aware of what the rule means for you before you can decide if its helpful or not.

For our alliance, and I would imagine many other casual raiders, the roster is developed on a "first come, first served" basis. That is to say, we don't have a core team, it's just who's available. This isn't to say you can't have a core team and still be "casual", because I know several people who pull this off (Abi over at kungaloosh is a great example of this. I think he'd definitely tell you his folks are casual, but they had basically the same people every week and tried to keep a consistent "team". This worked really well for them, but certainly would not for my neck of the woods. We just can't get people to commit like he can). Long parenthetical remark aside, the FCFS-basis means that you can't really pick and choose who you want. Therefore, it may well mean that having an "out" is a very good thing for you. As long as your membership is okay with being told "no", it's certainly not going to hurt you a lot. After all, the better gear you have in general, the better your chances of success in any instance.

In my particular situation, however, I don't think we need to go so far as to define a specific limit. It's not that we can't or shouldn't tell people they need better gear to join a certain run, but more that we should avoid painting ourselves into that corner. You see, as soon as you define that line, then it is defined. I know, defined line is defined. Duh, right? But think about that for a moment and I think you'll get what I'm saying.

As long as you're semi-nebulous about the gear limits, you can gracefully reject those that may need more gear than others. There's even a good way to go about doing this by saying things like "you may struggle with your gear in here and it would probably be a good idea to gear up before trying this run." Our people would hear that and say: "Okay, cool, I'll work on that." The only way you may get in trouble is if you let one person in and then deny another who happens to inspect or go out of their way to examine the gear of the other person and try to "call you on it". I say, in that situation, you're well within your right to say: "Look, this person just puts out better numbers than you." Or something along those lines. After all, they asked for it by not just taking the hint.

The point here is that we have wiggle room, and that's generally a good thing in a casual guild as long as you don't abuse it. I think most of our members realize that as a raid leader, my goal is to give us the best chance of success. This isn't some ninja-looting PuG team where you gotta watch your back. They're pretty confident that I'm not trying to play favorites about something when it's not in the best interests of success. It's sort of how we roll as a group.

In general and outside of my situation, I think that unless you're willing to go full "hardcore", it will serve your group better to have more wiggle room. This allows raid leaders to make decisions based on numerous inputs. Instead of setting a limit for each individual player, it's much better to look at the capability of the the group over all. Thus you have to take into account the gear and skill of your players, and make a decision for success. It also helps if you can explain and stick by your decision. Sometimes it may be very difficult to do, but if you're a respected leader, most folks will respect your decision and not get too bent out of shape, especially if you can explain to them what they can do to make themselves better.

For tanks, you really need a certain amount of gear to live. It's up to a RL to have a general idea of what this is. For DPS and healers, it's probably more indicative to look at the numbers they put out than the gear they wear. However, you have to take care to remember all the other factors as well. Like how mana-efficient a healer is or how good your DPS is at CC or whatever other skills might be needed for success. A decision based on all of the information will beat an arbitrary line any day of the week.

The Short Version

The wiggle room you gain by not setting hard limit can definitely work in your favor when you use it correctly, and will probably end up resulting in more long-term success. Setting a gear requirement is an easy way to help ensure a certain amount of success and selectivity. However, it is my opinion that it is most definitely not the best way to go about it. For my groups, I'd just prefer that we are honest with our members when we're putting together a raid and deal with it case-by-case based on what that night's needs are. I think in the long term, we'll see more content and have more fun, which are the goals our alliance was founded on.

Catching the Raiding Frustration Bug

It's seemed that a lot of my fellow bloggers have been recently been broadcasting their frustrations with raiding. From hardcore to casual, problems have seemed to be cropping up amongst previously successful groups. Some have blamed this one the ease of the originally offered raid content in WotLK. Some have pointed to different raiding ideologies and desires. Some have just talked about the changing nature of the game.

The bottom line, though, is that the end game raiding scene has changed in many ways with the Wrath of the Lich King expansion. Perhaps for better, perhaps for worse, but it has certainly changed. We have hard/easy modes, we have achievements, we have 10/25 mans, we have a plethora of different emblems. We have short raids and long raids. We have easy bosses and hard bosses. All this change has come at a price: our comfort with the game.

Yes, I said it. We are uncomfortable with the game as a community. The big change of an expansion came through and we all went: "Oh snap, shit's different!" Which can only be immediately followed by this internal dialogue: "Well, if everything's changing, what does that mean for me?"

That is the question being asked right now in hardcore and casual communities across Azeroth: "What's in it for me?" (Is that why you did this, Ray, for you?)

This malaise has not left my own raiding alliance unscathed. There is a great deal of frustration right now among our members who are itching for Ulduar when we haven't yet full cleared the 25-man flavor of Naxx. For us, getting 25 people together, focused, and efficient is a rather daunting task. We schooled the 10 man version, but we're still struggling through the 25 man stuff.

It isn't matter of skill. For us, it's a matter of seriousness. It's a matter of having too many different opinions and trying in vain to reconcile them with each other. We're a casual group of friends who want to see content. We open our arms to just about anyone with the same goals of "having fun" and "seeing end game content" without caveats. This has resulted in a melting pot of different raiding ideologies, however. We get people who want a lot of breaks, people who seem to always be late, people with tight time constraints, and people with neighbors who sometimes throw each other through the wall neccisstating a call to the cops (yeah, it's happened during one of our raids). You can't please all of the people all of the time, right?

So what, really, is the problem here? From what I can see, it's this: There are so many different end game paths, and we're not comfortable with it as a community. We haven't yet "figured it out".

You see, we've been given a whole bunch of new options when it comes to raiding at 80. Back in the day (which was a Tuesday), if you said you wanted to "see end game content", there was pretty much one path you had to follow.

In TBC, for instance, you did some 10-man Kara and got geared up. Then, you took your crew to some Gruul's and Mags for larger and harder raids. After than you probably went to SSC and geared through there. Finally, you might have seen the Tempest Keep, then Black Temple, then maybe the Sunwell (I never got past SSC, personally, but I think that's how you'd progress if I recall). The point being, there was pretty much one path to follow. In Vanilla WoW, I gather it was much the same.

In WotLK, we don't have just one path. We can start raiding in a bunch of different places; OS, VoA, and Naxx. You can start on 10 mans, or 25 mans, depending on your group. Then you can do Eye of Eternity if you gear through Naxx... but wait, you could also go back and try hard mode OS with drakes up. Or maybe you want to get all the raiding achievements because "just gearing up" isn't enough now. You need to "ace" the instance. With the addition of Ulduar, we see even more options. You can 10 or 25, you can hard or easy mode, you can go after more achievements.

Recall in TBC and before, we didn't have these options. Sure you could put them on "heroic" mode, but I think for the most part that people ran through one instance until they were geared enough to succeed in the next step. Then, you went to the next step and did the same thing there. As a group, there just weren't choices. If you joined an "end game raiding group", you knew what you were getting into. You would run some stuff until you got gear, then run some more stuff, going until your skill level was exhausted. The number of people needed may change based on where you're at in the progression, but it was the same goal.

Now, it's not so simple. You can join a purely 10-man end game group. You can join an achievement end game group. You could join a 3D and EoE farming end game group or just a "we've got Naxx on farm" end game group. The choice isn't just "casual" or "hardcore" any more, we now have a million shades of gray in between.

So now, everyone has an opinion, they have room to differ, and that's what we're hearing. We're seeing that while we all thought we had the same goals, we're actually a small bit different from each other. I mean a "gamer" isn't just a "gamer". You no long just have "casual" or "hardcore". What you have is people. And when you have people, that means you get a lot of different ideas and desires.

Not all of these ideas and desires fit together, thus we get friction. Friction we're not comfortable with. Friction we haven't had to deal with in the past. New game is new. Expansion is expanded.

I think at some point, as raid leaders, officers, GMs, and bloggers, we're going to have to realize that we're dealing with real people. We're in a massively multiplayer online game, and that means we have to deal with other people. It's going to be hard to condense everything into one common and cohesive goal or idea. We have a diverse game that is getting more diverse as it evolves. It's something to be proud of! We're a part of something that's pretty damn cool.

I suppose I'm just reiterating here what y'all already know. I'm not really offering any particularly clever solutions to the problems I've read about on the net. However, I am trying to identify and acknowledge the problem, because, as any good addict knows, that's the first step in breaking the cycle.

For my group of friends, it means we really have to buckle down and communicate better. We need to be able to share our in-game desires and compromise on them. If you want to work well as a team, that means you may need to give a little bit.

"But its MY game," you say. "Should not I focus on what is fun for ME?". Sure, when you're soloing. But, my friend, you gave up the "me" when you decided to become part of the "team". Raiding is a team event, remember that. You may need to "man-up" some nights for the good of the team. Like real life, it's not always sunshine and butterflies.

If being part of a team is not fun for you, you may want to acknowledge that and recognize it as a personal problem and stop complaining about it. A lot of us officers, GMs, RLs, and bloggers are trying really hard to fit this game back into our collective comfort boxes, so we can make the right decisions and have the most fun even if it takes some "un-fun" effort. Why? Because it means something more to us than "just a game". Because when the going gets tough... and all that jazz.

For me, I'm confident my group of friends will be successful. We'll figure it out. We'll get better. That's the kind of people we are. At this point, you should probably ask yourself, what kind of person are you?