We hear all the time about how this overblown sense of entitlement is ruining the game. About how Blizzard has cultivated a crop of gamers in Wrath who feel entitled to things. Every time I read it, I can help but think we're misusing the term a bit. It has such a pejorative cast to it right now, that calling someone "entitled" is like calling someone an asshat.
Yet, entitlement is what America was founded on. Americans, after all, are entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. It's right there, written on aged, yellowy paper. I can't speak for the other countries that make up the WoW-iverse, but I would assume they have similar statements of entitlement somewhere in their government documentation. Entitlement is essentially synonymous with "rights", though usually a bit more personal and perceived rather than a global truth. In that regard, we have a whole Bill of Entitlements. Right or wrong, that's how the government I'm most familiar with (and live in) started: with a sense of entitlement.
Now, I'm not saying entitlement can't be overblown. In fact, an exaggerated sense of entitlement is one of the key characteristics of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Entitlement, when taken to extremes, can certainly be bad. However, I can't help but want to ameliorate the term. There can be such a thing as a healthy sense of entitlement.
So I ask you, dear reader, to think about the things in WoW that it is appropriate to feel entitled to. If we were to make a Declaration of Co-dependence to send to Blizzard, what would our inalienable rights be? If we were writing an Azerothian Bill of Rights, what would be contained within? Or, if you're more comfortable in a Constitutional Monarchy: if you were writing An Act Declaring the Rights and Liberties of the Subject and Settling the Succession of the Crown, what might be writ therein? Or, if you're living in Soviet Russia: what would Bill of Rights write about you? (I'm being facetious, of course. Current-day Russia is no longer a Soviet Union, it is a Semi-presidential Republic.)
Here, I'll get the party started first:
We, the denizens of Azeroth, in order to form a less arbitrarily insulting society do ordain and establish these points of entitlement:
- We shall be provided with a playable game, without having to put up with an unreasonable amount of downtime. We get Tuesday maintenance, but if your shit crashes on a Saturday night... it's on.
- Taxation by subscription only. If you start nickle and diming us for content, there will be hell to pay. Sparkly ponies are, apparently, okay. Be careful though, we wouldn't want to have to go all Tea Party on your ass. Alternatively, we're not completely opposed to other business models, it would just be tough to switch horses in midstream, if you will. We could always pull a Prohibition on this one if you come up with something wickedly cool that we've never even heard of. Then we could go back when it doesn't work.
- There shall be varied raids. Facelifts on old raids are okay so long as they play well at the current maximum level. Complete reuse is only permissible in the case of Onyxia, because she was an awful awful bitch. And maybe Ragnaros, you can do him too. I like his yelling.
- There shall be levels, and we shall be able to gain them. Leveling is important too, mmkay?
- PvP is optional, but you already got our hopes up, so you'd better make it good.
- Trees and abilities shall be roughly balanced. One class shall not be exorbitantly greater in prowess than another by design. We shall term this being "OP" and it shall be unacceptable. We reserve the right to complain, loudly, when we perceive imbalance, however we acknowledge that we may not be right, and/or it was not done intentionally. In that case, it shall be fixed... pronto.
- The environment shall be poly-climatic. We want to be able to explore and see different things. Don't George Lucas us and give us entire planets of only one ecosystem. Though, if you give us multiple planets, we may not complain in that case either. Just mix it up, ffs.
- Communication shall be enabled and convenient. This could fall under article 1, since communication is key for an MMO, but we made another one just to be sure you "got it". In addition, we shall have the right to "block" certain unsavory characters from "spamming" our chat fields. You should probably ban those gold sellers too. They're bad juju.
- There shall be some degree of challenge to the game. If a one celled organic player, we'll call him Parameciumlol, can clear all the content, then you haven't lived up to your charter. Similar to the "OP" clause, we reserve the right to submit varied opinions as to the current and future potential levels of "challenge". We will probably submit them in the form of vitriol and ragequitting, but we might surprise you and be loquacious too. In either case, you need only make sure there is something challenging in the game to satisfy this article.
- Our personal information shall not be shared with "creepy" collectives or individuals. Creepy shall be defined on a person by person basis as "anyone who we strongly do not wish to have show up at our front f-in door or send crap in mail, both electronic and snail." Investigative committees may be formed to help define key terms "personal" and "information" and "shared" and "be", but just be careful because this one is impeachment worthy for a lot of folks.