Friday, October 16, 2009

Tonight, We Dine In Hell

*Dusty the Ghoul sits staring aimlessly at a sputtering candle on a table*
Midnight: What's he doing? He's been staring at that blasted candle for hour now!
Berry Blue: Maybe he's caught the flame of looove.
Midnight: Right. You have no idea, do you?
*Sparkie the Felpup jumps up on the counter for no apparent reason, catching the attention of the other two minions in the room*
Berry Blue: Yo, Sparkie, get down. You know the master don't like you jumpin' on the counters.
*The Felhunter makes a snuffing sound*
Midnight: Get. Down. Now. I'll come over there and whip you.
*Sparkie jumps off*
Midnight: See Blue, you just have to be a bit firm. Boys respond better to direct orders.
Berry Blue: Hey, I've got an idea. Spaz! Come here, imp.
*Spaz runs out into the room, banging into stuff along the way*
Spaz: Yeahwhaddyawant?!
Berry Blue: I heard that Dusty over there done stole your sweets.
Spaz: WHAAAA?! Sweeeeets!
*The Imp launches himself at the Ghoul, rummaging throughout the rags that hang from the slightly-less-than-animated corpse*
Spaz: Candycandycandycandycandycandy!
*Dusty fails to respond to the Imps provocations. Due to the rummaging Imp, the Ghoul's arm falls off*
Spaz: There'snocandyhere! Yourcandyisalie!
*The other two minions shrug*
Midnight: Maybe DeeGee knicked 'em. Why don't you go fetch him for me?
*The Imp speeds back out of the room, running into the door frame once before disappearing into the gloom beyond.*
Berry Blue: Well, what now? Is he dead?
*While the big blue minion is busy poking the Ghoul with a stick, Decedereful the Death Knight enters the abode*
Berry Blue: Dearest Decedereful, your dead companion has fallen prey to discordant notes.
Decedereful: What?
Midnight: Your Ghoul is borked.
Decedereful: Oh! No. He's just hungry.
Berry Blue: Ah the pangs of hunger. Oft have I felt their siren call.
Decedereful: Is he always like this?
Midnight: Only for you, dear. What does he eat?
Decedereful: Brains.
Midnight: I'm not sure we have any of those.
Decedereful: Oh, I'm sure any good warlock keeps some brains around. Sparkie, where does your master keep the your food.
*The puppy jumps happily back up on the counter, nosing at a cupboard. Decedereful walks over and removes a jar filled with a gelatenous substance*
Decedereful: Yuck, mage brains. Of course he'd have these. Not the best quality of brains, but it'll have to do.
Berry Blue: Felhunters eat brains?
Decedereful: Mostly mages. Not just the brain, either, but that's probably the best part. Not that that's saying a whole lot.
*A small ding seems to sound from somewhere and the Death Knight looks up towards the ceiling*
Decedereful: Ha! A summons! Must be getting near raid time. Finally, I'm getting my shot! Here.
*She tosses the jar of brains to the Voidwalker*
Decedereful: Feed him these, he'll perk up. He may try to construct a portal out of air for a bit, or make a table of pastries out of... who knows, but he'll come to his senses as soon as he digests the brains. Gotta go.
*She disappears*
Deegee (yelling from the back): GET THIS IMP OFF ME!
Midnight: Right, gotta go.